youLOVE: some naked truths about boudoir

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In case you didn't notice, January is usually wrought with photographer announcements for boudoir specials (which may be called boudoir, pin-up, glamour, solo, spirit, etc.) This is no accident - not only is it a popular idea to gift one's partner with a sassy book or a set of racy prints for Valentine's Day, but it's the off-season for most photographers since family sessions and weddings happen with greater frequency during the warmer months when going outdoors is possible, and because of temperatures around these parts we have little choice but to shoot indoors during the coldest months of the year. Boudoir is usually an indoor kind of event anyways, and so it works out well. If you missed out on the January events, fear not - February successes usually result in March repeats. Who says you can't do a boudoir book to celebrate St. Patrick's Day? Or Easter? Or Canada Day? Or Tuesday? Or the first day of kids being back at school? There are photographers who specialize in nothing BUT boudoir... but if you missed out on the winter specials with your fave photog, fear not - lots of us start up with calendar-making sessions in November along with their Christmas Card specials.

So what's the big deal about these "woman alone" sessions anyways? you may be wondering. Women, especially mothers, often don't take much time for themselves. They spend a vast portion of their time being caregivers and looking out for the needs of others, often before their own. It's not because we have to - most of us (even if we complain about it from time to time) totally love it. But, we easily forget what it was like to be the centre of our own universe, when most of what we did served no greater purpose than to fulfill our own wants and desires. Sure, a woman can go take a spa day or a weekend alone in the mountains every now and again, but there's something empowering about having your girly glory documented, in full-colour high-definition photographs that make men drool and other women envious. With few exceptions, even women who are terrified to step in front of the camera walk away from these personal sessions feeling powerful, sexy, and reinvigorated. They experience a high from seeing themselves in a way they can't when they're just looking in the mirror, and THAT is why these sessions are such hot sellers.

Now, there are a tonne of sites out there where you can get educated about what to expect or look for when booking a boudoir shoot, but since you're here already, instead of making you look I'll just give you a few tips and hints.

Number One, and Most Important of Everything, is finding a photographer whose style AND personality mesh well with yours. Most Important. If you feel uncomfortable with your photographer or aren't sure if they will create images you like let alone adore, then you're dead in the water. So, where to begin...

The first step is knowing what kind of pictures you want. If you want classic 40s glamour, hiring a 'tog who specializes in soft 80s retro style is a bad idea because you aren't going to have any pictureLOVE afterwards. If you want vintage 50s rebel, hiring someone who specializes in architectural nudes isn't your best bet. If you like a particular photographer's work or have worked with them before and want to know if they do boudoir... ask. They can probably show you a few pictures or at least answer your question, even if that answer is, "I've never done it but would LOVE to try!" If you're satisfied that they will create images you can love, you're on to the next step.

Once you've viewed their portfolio, if you haven't already met them, make a point of at least talking to them on the phone because emails aren't really the easiest way of getting to know someone. You may even want to meet them for coffee if you can both swing it. If you talk to the person on the phone and they are super energetic and enthusiastic, you may love that, but it's OK to be put off by exuberance, too, and find someone who is a little more mellow. If you don't feel comfortable with your photographer on the phone or meeting over Frappaccinos at Starbuck's, how hard is it going to be to feel comfortable in your skivvies with them? Probably not going to be the best experience for either you or your photographer.

Shop to Drop Jaws. Your photographer is presumably skilled at posing, using flattering lighting, lenses and angles, and coaching you on facial expressions, so your only job is to show up and be the goddess. Often photographers have professional hair and make-up teams on hand, but the clothes are your responsibility. Maybe you don't know your body type, but there are some fabulously helpful people at most lingerie stores. They can professionally fit you with a bra and show you the latest additions to this season's lines that will play up your best assets and boost your confidence by not highlighting those body parts that you maybe feel uncomfortable with. If you have great legs and your hubby loves your breasts, but you're very self-conscious about your belly and thighs, your salesperson should be quick at finding you a variety of babydoll dresses that will cloak your tummy and thighs while allowing you to have killer cleavage and gloriously exposed gams. Likewise, if you feel your breasts are too small but think you have the cutest butt ever, your salesperson should be able to produce a push-up bra and a pair of frilly-bottom Cuban style undies in a flash. And, if you're just not feeling like you can have that much skin on display, you can still pull off totally sultry and sexy with a little black dress or even a silky bathrobe paired with killer spiked heels. (Hint: You'll know you've found the right outfit when you feel inexplicably spicy when you put it on.)

Besides your lingerie, you should have two or three outfits and lots of accessories picked out because it gives both you and the photographer lots of choices. Your tickle trunk might include a feather fan or a strand of pearls to go with your bustier and garters, one of your partner's dress shirts and their motorcycle helmet or work boots, great jeans or yoga pants and a muscle shirt, your favourite pyjama bottoms and fuzzy slippers, a pleated skirt and knee-highs... If you are going for more of a stylized glamour or pin-up look, consult with your photographer on where to find great dresses, shoes, and hair baubles, where you can rent a costume, or how to pull together a vintage grease-monkey look at the Goodwill.

If at all possible, try and incorporate things that have special and maybe secret meaning to you and/or your partner. Bring in your framed degree or your Weight Watchers card. Or grab the colander you were asked to bring to your partner's house the first time he cooked you dinner because he discovered his roomie had used theirs to sift the cat box. No object or article is too strange or silly - as long as it has special meaning to YOU, it will make your pictures totally unique.

Once you get your outift or outfits ready, practice makes perfect. If you are surprising your other half, this might be tricky, but if you can muster it, practice making faces, strutting, prancing, lounging, and especially laughing and smiling. If you are doing your own make-up and hair, you should be rehearsing that as well - it's better to know ahead of time if you're going to need the help of a professional hair and make-up team to get the false eyelashes on right and make your hair look look tousled instead of bed-head-ish. Spend some time looking at pictures that you love and channel glamourous, sultry, cheesy, playful, seductive, and everything else. Spin, arch, twist, kick up your heels, and get into the spirit - the sillier you feel doing it, the better. If you don't feel like a giddy 13-year old doing it, try harder, because if you make your focus on having FUN the rest will fall into place.

Getting ready should start several days before your shoot. Make sure you drink your 6 to 8 glasses of water and eat sensibly (not starve yourself - no photographer ever wants someone passing out from low blood sugar on a shoot) and get lots of sleep. These simple steps will help you feel healthy and well-rested while preventing things like feeling bloated and puffy bags under your eyes. The night before your shoot take special care to moisturize (repeat in the morning if necessary) and get a good rest. P.S. Avoiding caffeine and alcohol is a good idea, too.

On the morning of your shoot, dress in loose comfy clothes - slipping on a pair of skinny jeans will leave red welts and creases in your skin that even the most expert Photoshopper will find challenging and downright frustrating to minimize or remove. Go commando in slouchy socks, yoga pants with a wide waistband, and an oversized t-shirt; skip the bra if you plan on being topless or strapless, too... Eat lightly on the day of the shoot and avoid caffeine - you don't want to feel over-full and like you need a bathroom break every 10 minutes. But, feel free to indulge in champagne and chocolate covered strawberries provided by your photographer during the shoot... Pack a CD of your fave tunes for the photographer to pop in during your shoot, then, relax and remember to breath...

Don't sweat the small stuff - when you are setting up your session you can't predict a big ugly zit coming along to spoil your day. Even the photographers who don't do a lot of post-processing will help you deal with that. BUT - if you have scars, stretch marks, freckles, wrinkles, or moles you want removed, you need to discuss this with your photographer beforehand, as not all will remove them without an additional fee, and others won't remove them at all. It's also a good idea to be open with your photographer about what you are and are not comfortable with on your body before getting there - maybe you have great cleavage but want the focus on your fabulous abs, or perhaps you aren't comfortable having your legs photographed but love your back. Giving your photographer a heads-up will help them design the best poses, lighting, and angles to flaunt what you feel are your best assets. But, you may also need to trust your photographer if they ask you to try something you hadn't thought of - after all, they're the expert. If you don't like the resulting images, you don't have to pick them for your collection, but often they can help you see something gorgeous about yourself that you never knew.

While most photographers do private boudoir sessions, there are often boudoir 'marathons' which is where a team is assembled in a great location to accommodate several clients in one day. There are benefits and drawbacks to both, and which one you choose is a matter of personal preference including budget, scheduling, and what YOU feel comfortable with.

WHEN: A private session may be more relaxed in terms of schedule and flexibility so you can pick a date and time that works well for you. A marathon is usually scheduled in hour-long slots to accommodate multiple participants on a specific date, which you will need to organize your personal schedule to accommodate.

HOW LONG: You may or may not get extra camera time with a private session, depending on the photographer, but generally speaking because we aren't trying to work with unpredictable children, multiple people and personalities, and sketchy weather or lighting, your photographer can easily get the job done in an hour or less with two or three outfits whether you go private or marathon. (This is NOT including hair and make-up which is at least an hour before your camera time, so budget at least 2 hours plus travel time either way.)

WHERE: With a private session you usually have the option of choosing your own special location such as the hotel room you spent your wedding night in or your own bedroom or your husband's garage, whereas a marathon is at a set location chosen by the photographer. For marathons the cost of the venue is usually rolled into the price already. With a private session you may be responsible for paying out of pocket for the venue, over and above your session fee - make sure you confirm this BEFORE you book.

HOW MANY PEOPLE: A private session gives you a great deal of privacy if you are a shy person. Some of us prefer the intimacy or require the secrecy (some hubbies know what the family photographer is up to!) for personal reasons. On the other hand, booking back-to-back sessions with one or two friends can be a great bonding experience. If you come to a marathon solo, it's also a bonus seeing the women ahead of you come out looking like a bombshell and glowing from the experience!

HOW MUCH: The cost of boudoir photography needs to be examined carefully. Photographers price their packages differently and you need to read the fine print. Most photographers have a few hair and make-up people they regularly work with. Like the price of the venue, boudoir marathons usually have the cost of these rolled into the price, but it varies in private sessions and you may be responsible for doing it yourself or finding and paying for your own hair and make-up team. So, for $350 Photographer A may provide hair and make-up and a 20-page 8x8 album in their home studio, while for the same price Photographer B just shows up at the venue you've paid for to take pictures of you with your hair and make-up already done at your own expense and expects you to buy any images you want from your session at a la carte prices or make what's referred to as a 'minimum investment' or 'required commitment' to purchase $1500 worth of photography products. Price shouldn't dictate what you are willing to spend, but if it conflicts with what you are able to spend you need to make some decisions.

DEPOSITS/RETAINERS: Make absolutely sure that you understand the terms and conditions of any deposit or retainer you have paid - it is usually non-refundable and non-transferable. Chickening out is never an acceptable reason to cancel - if you're feeling nervous, call your photographer and talk it over - they will help put your mind at ease. You're a strong, beautiful woman and that's what your photographer wants to show you. Now, sometimes things beyond our control happen - your photographer may let you carry your deposit forward to another date if something unexpected comes up and you can't make it (you get the flu, your car dies, unexpected company arrives, etc.) especially if you give enough notice for someone else to take your booking, but always assume that it is non-refundable and non-transferable.

THE DISC: Please note that while most photographers happily provide a disc of low-resolution watermarked images for you to enjoy, many boudoir photographers will not include or sell a disc of the high-resolution images as it protects both you and them from any possibility of the images falling into the wrong hands. You shouldn't hesitate to ask your photographer how the images are handled. Most photographers retain copyright of their images and are therefore free to use the images in any way they wish, but they often make exceptions where boudoir pictures are concerned to be sensitive to their clients who may be perfectly happy getting their child's naked bum picture blogged, but not so much their own. When you are asked to sign a model release, make sure you understand what your rights are in terms of your photographer's use of those images. Even if you have a good relationship with your photographer and have a standing agreement (verbal or written) in place, you shouldn't feel shy about asking for one where boudoir photos are concerned if it will give you peace of mind.

USE OF THE IMAGES: Not all photographers use model releases but deliver your goods sealed in packages that when opened are binding to the terms written on the outside. Ditto for images delivered over the web via ftp site or an online album, where clicking the download button is your virtual signature. Software companies have been using this method for years, and yes, the act of breaking that seal or downloading the images IS considered a legally binding contract. If this is your photographer's method of delivery, make sure you read it carefully before cracking open the Canada Post parcel or hitting "download." Really, though, at the end of the day, when it comes to pictures of you and your loved ones, an ethical photographer will ask you to identify any pictures you would prefer not to have displayed, and will respect your wishes regardless of what the written terms are anyways.

BUT WHAT ABOUT... You may have seen claims that boudoir marathons are impersonal and that the sets aren't hygienic because more than one person uses the same sheets, but that's just silly. If you've done your homework, you've already communicated with your photographer enough to know you feel you can trust them so the session will not be impersonal. Further more, I assure you that unless you've hired a shady photographer who specializes in porn and booked into a motel off the highway with broken neon signs that advertise "cheap hourly rates" it's safe to assume that your photographer has taken great pains to pick an ideal location (usually a quaint B&B, a carefully designed set in their home or office studio, or a swanky hotel.) When you consider how much primping and preening you've all done before arriving, there is no need to be concerned with the cleanliness of the bed sheets (if you even use a bed - some sets involve a chaise long and a leather footstool instead) whether you're first or fifth in line, and if it is, it's maybe something you need to take up with the proprietor of the establishment and not the photographer...

Which brings us back to Number One, which is Most Important: finding a photographer whose style AND personality mesh well with yours. Regardless of what you are willing or able to spend, regardless of whether you pick a private or marathon session, regardless of whether you want to do it for yourself or a loved one, you must feel like the photographer you are going with has your kind of pictureLOVE down in spades.

There's no universal right or wrong answer - only YOUR right or wrong. You know who you are. You know what you like. You know what you want and need.

Now, go get some sexy on!

muchLOVE,

Hope

This article is copyrighted, but feel free to share the link to this post by pasting this address: http://hopewallsphotography.blogspot.com/2010/02/youlove-some-naked-truths-about-boudoir.html