youLOVE: on the sixth day of Christmas...

...my youLOVE gave to me:

6 birds a-roasting....

The truth of the matter is simply this: I only cook a turkey for the stuffing, and I make some seriously tasty stuffing. While it varies from year to year a little bit here or there, my stuffing is the first thing gone. Usually right around the time the parmesan mushroom gravy goes. I usually make a 20lb or bigger bird, so while the quantities may sound like a lot, it's a HUGE bird to feed my huge family.

Aside of using 1" chunks of a whole loaf of nice multigrain bread that is dried/toasted in the oven the night before, my stuffing starts with LOTS of melted butter. LOTS of sage and garlic. Melt the butter in a big huge pot and sautee up the garlic and sage with a big fat juicy onion and a whole crapload of mushrooms. Add lots of rosemary, and some poultry seasoning. Fry up the liver and heart if you like and throw them in, too - I've heard tell that if you cut them small enough most people don't notice them. I usually throw in some Italian sausage for good measure. Try and not taste-test too much of this, though - it's really really uber bad for your arteries...

Take your chunks of bread and throw them in a big bowl. Drizzle the butter-sausage mixture over the bread crumbs, tossing to get the liquid evenly distributed. Get this mixture as evenly moist as possible (big wooden spoons work well) and while continuing to stir pour just enough boiling hot water over the mixture to give it a slightly-dry crumble consistency. Peel a couple of mandarin oranges and throw them in. Throw in some sunflower seeds, dried cranberries, or pecans, too. Mix that all up and stuff the birdie's butt and the birdie's neck flap with as much of it as you can.

Have you got a secret ingredient, helpful tip, or traditional family recipe to share?